Through creating a vivid vision during parenthood, you can build your unique roadmap to success and transform all your dreams into reality.
Ever put your parenting hat down for a moment to get clear about the vision of your life?
Or are you sucked into the day-to-day responsibilities of being a parent that you’ve forgotten about the direction of your own life?
Maybe you’re just somewhere in the middle. Years ago you made a dream board after you watched “The Secret” movie but now you don’t even remember which closet you left it in.
You see, I’m not asking these questions to judge you. Quite the opposite actually. My intention is to provide a gentle loving reminder so you can think about an important part of your life.
I’m talking about the vision for your future and the direction you want to take your personal and family life towards.
Why do you need a vision you might ask? Well… because without having a vivid vision for your life, you end up giving the power to other people and situations to set a vision for you.
The problem is, those people and situations don’t know what you want. They only know what they want. So if there’s no alignment between what they want and what you want, then you’re in trouble.
Plus when you’re a parent you already have time and resources constraints so the last thing you want is to get to a place where you may not like what you’ve achieved or become.
A good vision allows you to reach your full potential. So the combination of that in addition to parenting being a forcing function for personal growth makes right now the best time to create a vivid vision for your life.
Life vision before and after becoming a parent
Let’s be honest. Everything changes when you become a parent. And I know this first hand because before becoming a parent I thought I had a pretty clear vision for my life.
But that vision was created when I didn’t have the parenting perspective. All I had thought of was the number of children I wanted in my future family.
What I had missed was who I was going to become after having a child. Plus I had no idea how every area of my life was going to shift in such radical ways.
Basically, I had a vision that wouldn’t work for my new life as a parent. Unfortunately, the majority of that vision focused on external elements like the type of home or gadgets I wanted to have.
So although a good looking vision, it became uninspiring and useless once I stepped into the world of parenthood.
But of course, during the early stages who’s got time to think about abstract ideas like having a life vision when all you want to do is catch up on sleep.
That’s why I also ignored its importance and just kept living life day-to-day as I began to prioritize all these new responsibilities that fell onto my plate.
What I hadn’t realized was the impact of that kind of lifestyle. It’s normal to just focus on the day-to-day when you’re dealing with sleep deprivation, mid-night fevers, or teething issues.
But like most problems. Leaving it alone won’t automatically solve it. If anything, like a cavity in a tooth, things tend to get worse by not paying attention to them.
The real challenge with lacking a vision as a parent
You see, the struggle became real when we passed the early stages and were starting to bring our heads out of the sand.
As a result, many key questions began to come up in our conversations. We’d be asking each other questions like…
Where’s the best place to live as a young family?
What are the best educational systems we agree with?
How do you raise a child without losing yourself in the process?
These were all legit questions that I’m sure you might have asked yourself too after becoming a parent.
But the problem was, we had no immediate answers and before becoming parents we hadn’t taken the time to get clear about any of them. And the more we dug in the more questions came up.
So having to deal with the challenges at hand plus navigating towards an unknown future made us once again realize the need for creating a vivid vision for our new life.
But this time we decided to take the parenting perspective into account and create a vision that not only is exciting and inspiring but it also allows us to grow as individuals.
To do that my wife and I asked ourselves if we had to only learn the three most important components of what makes a vivid vision, what would they be?
That question set us on the path to discovering the three essential parts to creating a vivid vision as a parent.
After all becoming a parent had fully shifted our perspective on life, how we prioritize, and what we value the most.
So think of your vision as a container that’s made out of three main components. In order for you to create it, you must first know what it is made of.
The 3 components of a vivid vision
We knew how before we had put an extra focus on external elements. So this time we wanted to strike a good balance between that and more intangible or internal elements.
That’s why the three components we came up with will allow you to create a vivid vision that pulls you towards itself in a way that’s unique to you.
It’s important that your vision is unique to you because no one knows you better than you.
And when you don’t get in life what you wanted, no one else may feel the disappointment as much as you might.
Below I’m going to walk you through each component so you can also begin to think about creating your own vivid vision.
In this component, you want to think about the exact style of life you want to create for your future life. Hence why it’s called “Lifestyle”.
This is where you can let your materialistic side shine. You can think of what kind of a home you want to live in. Maybe you need more rooms for the children? Or maybe you now need a home office.
How about getting around? Do you need a bigger car to fit your children’s strollers or sports gears?
Have fun with this one but also be careful you don’t end up with a shallow list of meaningless things.
Be conscious as you write each one down. Ask yourself “why do I need this” a few times to make sure it’s a real need and not just a sheer want.
What else can you think of? Gadgets, clothes, furniture, etc. Basically, take a good look at your immediate environments. Do the stuff you currently own actually serve you? Do they make you happy?
Because if they don’t, it’s time to let them go and think of new items that you’d love and really need.
Again, make sure you really think deeply about each item. Think of how it’s made, where it’s made, and what kind of impact it has on the planet you leave behind for your children.
There’s no reason for being extreme on either side. You don’t have to be an excessive consumer that buys everything but you also don’t have to live like a monk.
Get clear on what truly makes you happy and make sure it’s not coming from a place of needing to validate anything to others or even yourself and have lots of fun with this process.
In this component, you want to think about the exact type of experiences you want to have in your life.
Maybe you always wanted to travel by a hot air balloon but now with a toddler, it may not sound as much of a good idea anymore. Not enough space to run around plus the fire?
Well… then how about a trip to the science museum with your little ones and learning about how the world functions.
Or what about that band you always wanted to see live? You get the idea, right?
It’s all about the experiences. After all, as humans, we tend to value experiences more than collecting materialistic possession.
There are countless studies proving that we get more out of life by spending time and money on meaningful experiences vs. buying random products.
Have you always dreamed about seeing the Northern Lights? What’s stopping you? The truth is, a dream without a plan is just a wish.
So when you get clear about the experiences you want to have, you also begin to create plans for actually making them happen.
With that outlook, you can start to have lots of fun with this process. The universe becomes like a catalog of experiences you can’t wait to have.
But here’s a tip to make it even more fun. Do you know what makes awesome experiences even better?
You guessed that right. Doing them with the people you love. So as you explore this area think of your family.
What kind of experiences do they want? What kind of experiences do you want that they can also enjoy? Ask them and then share your list with them.
In this component, you want to think of your own life and your personal growth journey.
Always wanted to learn French?
How about finally writing that book?
What about doing public speaking?
Noticing a pattern here? That’s because this part is all about what pushes you outside of your comfort zone. The type of things that by doing them you grow as a person.
And the by-product of that is the kind of example you’ll set for your children. The more you grow as a person the more their vision of the human potential will be expanded.
So get clear about the exact things that will help you grow in a way that’s both scary and exciting.
It’s when there’s a right mix of both that something becomes interesting enough to pursue and sustain.
That means if you want to write a book or give a speech, make sure it’s about a topic you’re big-time passionate about. But also it’s a topic you think you still can learn more about.
The more you get out of your comfort zone, the more the universe will reward you with growth opportunities. But you don’t have to think of going to Mars if you haven’t left the continent you were born in yet.
You can start with smaller and more doable things and then work your way up to more difficult things. Like a muscle that has the potential to grow but it needs practice.
As mentioned earlier, this area is the one you want to make sure the focus stays on you. It’s OK to feel a little selfish. If you ever needed a permission, here’s one. Go ahead and think of your own personal growth.
So what’s the conclusion?
The last good time to create a vision was 20 years ago and the next best time is now.
Your vision is a key element that enables you to choose the direction for where you want to take your life to.
It’s this strong sense of vision that allows successful people to pursue their dreams.
By having a crystal clear and exciting vision for your future you will be able to sit in the driver’s seat of your life and achieve your dreams with ease.
As a parent, you may compromise your personal freedom or ambitions. If you don’t get crystal clear about the direction of your life you will feel lost and confused about where it’s headed.
After learning the three components of a vivid vision, you’ll be able to create your unique roadmap to success so you can transform your dreams into reality.
So what’s one thing you plan on doing to create a vivid vision during parenthood? Let me know by commenting below.